A letter to the Avoidant from a now Secure Woman

I asked you to respect me and unblock me from your socials. Funny how you blocked me because you cheated and lied and then gaslighted me by telling me you didn’t trust me.

It was such a simple act. You could have even responded with a “no”. Yet you chose silence like usual, to control everything by not responding at all.

Only communicating on your terms, as long as I was saying and doing everything exactly how you wanted.

You are so simple and low-key.

Funny though… I could already see all your activity on your socials. I have since day one.

It wasn’t even about your socials.

It was simply about respecting my feelings.

Respecting me as a person.

The principle of it all.

Something you are incapable of doing with anyone. I understand that now.

You aren’t worth my energy any longer.

You thought you were important to me… which the irony is… you were only important to my growth. In seeing what a dismissive avoidant like yourself, could do to my nervous system.

You yourself… are not important.

Just the lessons I learned from you of what I will never tolerate from anyone anymore.

You yourself… as a human… well you are just a little boy than never grew up. You choose to be stuck in emptiness. Never having anything of emotional depth. Never trying to have a healthy relationship with anyone.

I however have flourished in understanding my own attachment style and grew into a beautiful, emotionally secure woman.

I outgrew you.

I don’t hate you, nor do I love you.

You are indifferent to me.

Just a man I once thought I knew, yet never had the capacity to understand someone at your level. So because of continuing to try to understand why you are so empty, cold, unable to deal with deep emotions or conversations, I learned the greatest gift of all.

That I’m worth so much more than anything you could have ever offered me ❤️

I didn’t just survive your emotional abuse and distance… I became a stronger, a more powerful woman that knows her worth.

I found self love ❤️

While you now fit into the background noise of a six year long study … of a severe dismissive avoidant with high narcissistic traits.

I didn’t loose a single thing with you…

The best part is… you will never understand me, because you can’t rise to my level.

So the cycle is broken.

I am secure.

I am free.