When someone comes into your life and blesses you with growth and new tools to grow, it can be a bitter/sweet experience. What I mean by this, is that sometimes we needed the experience for growth in areas that we needed to learn, because we can read about self-growth, but like everything… we need to practice it and try it out. Growth and lessons are beautiful, but can be painful at the same time. Humbling in fact. It is all part of growing in this amazing journey called life.

I have been reminded of this in a recent journey.  The old saying “Actions speak louder than words” is true, however, I have come to learn that words support actions and open lines of communication.

When we start to have relations with someone (anyone… friend, family, coworkers etc.) we need to stop and listen to what they tell you. Now, that being said, actions are just as important. You truly need both for the full picture of a person and full understanding of what is needed or where things go. Words are nice but they are just words. If the actions do not match those words, then there are problems that you need to look into. Actions are incredibly valuable but they also need to be supported with words. BOTH are vital. Communication takes words, actions support the communication for understanding. It shows you that what is said is true and being heard and the person is willing to support that through actions.

I had been in a relationship that was all words and no action. I use to say that I needed actions not just words. WELL…. Now I have experienced all actions and lack of words.  Let me tell you what… It is wonderful… but damn, if a person cannot communicate, then actions only go so far. It also must be a mutual understanding and effort on both sides.

I feel so lucky to have obtained these experiences! I honestly had never realized how important words are to me! Imagine never being told to your face that you are attractive in your persons eyes, or valued, appreciated, loved, wanted, desired, what their needs are in a relationship, what their triggers are from past experiences. What their boundaries are, what they feel towards you… you get the gist. Yes, you can “feel” they care by things they may do, “think” they find you attractive by the way they look at you, “think” they are upset by the way they get short with you etc., but to not have that line of communication open to support their thoughts and their actions?? WEW, that’s a hard one for me personally to navigate through. I mean, if actions speak louder than words… yet words are needed for open communication and understanding, then personally, I must have both.

Not only that, but if you openly communicate your thoughts, needs, boundaries and their actions shut you down with only words communicating back, then that my friends, is a MUCH larger problem! So is being shown actions, yet their words are telling you something different. For example…. showing love, but their words are telling you they are not ready! UGG… what a confusing way to live! NO…. BOTH words and actions TOGETHER equate to a healthy, loving, secure relationship or work environment. Do not settle for less!

Point being… life, relationships, jobs etc. are so very difficult if words and actions are not both present. We cannot change or force people to listen or act…. But we can walk away when we see there are larger problems right from the first few months of meeting someone special, starting a new job, or meeting new friends. We do not have time to wait for people to grow, to meet us where we ourselves had to go through the shit to learn and grow! Wish them the best and maybe paths will cross again down the road…. Or maybe you wont. Let the Universe decide that. Just do NOT waste time waiting for anyone that is not ready to match your needs or does not see where they need to grow. That will most certainly block your personal growth or put you at risk to have to relearn what you know. That is not your job, nor will it center your energy in life. Words are needed for communicating, actions are needed to support words…both need to be present for understanding.

 Self Love people! Keep on growing! Find the person on the same growth path. Life is to short to wait for someone that has not learned how to communicate and give action!

Peace, Love and Light

Nomadic Soul Seeker