It is so interesting traveling with Covid19 out here. So many states have different thoughts about this virus… it is quite terrifying. States are all in different phases and each phase seems to entail different rules! Top this off with which states /areas you need to stay away from because of riots and pissed off people. Campgrounds are at 50% capacity and many have higher rates to make up for loss of cash. People seem off, angry, confused, and afraid… OR don’t care, don’t believe, they feel invincible and have rights beyond what they actually do . What a crazy world we have entered.

I myself…. Am afraid. I am afraid of people right now. I am afraid for the United States and what we are becoming. I am afraid people are dismissing those that have lost their life in this battle.  I am afraid of the anger I feel around me, the energy changed in mankind. I believe the pendulum is swinging out of control. We are losing our focus for kindness. What is happening is harsh! You see…. I get to see so many different aspects/viewpoints as I travel through different areas, not on the news, not from a small area ..but in person. I am AFRAID.

I wonder if we are at a pivotal moment in time where we should be embracing each other and loving deeper and stronger instead of being the ones that start conversations that create anger. It surrounds us on T.V., around listening to others and their bantering about this, that and the other that is wrong or questionable. We are fueling this anger and fear!

I have found myself a bit lost. Alone. Lonely…. For human love and kindness. I find myself not knowing which way to travel…each direction having growth and effort in learning about me and growing (all directions being hard ones to confront). This journey… damn it is truly hard and humbling. I have seen the worst in me and the best in me and all sorts of wishy washy middle ground. Yet, I AM growing. I find myself discovering new situations and feelings, new passions, new challenges. I love this journey for sure…. Never ever did I realize how HARD it truly is to change your brain from abuse, toxic people, boundaries, trusting yourself and finding light through all the shit! I’ve learned WHAT and WHY we have boundaries and that YOUR boundaries are ok… they are YOURS and they are there for YOUR protection. When you allow someone to push you back and walk through your boundaries, your are causing so much self-harm. You do not trust yourself or your boundaries. Allowing others to alter your self-esteem., your thoughts, your beliefs.  I am learning to walk away from situations that cause self-damage. To look past what my brain says and listen to my heart and gut. To speak up when I feel hurt, violated, afraid, concerned, or threatened in being me. I have learned that I did not in fact love myself, even when I thought I did. I was stuck. I now apply my new knowledge, yet still having along long ways to go, and trust myself. If I truly had listen to my gut instinct, I would have avoided so much pain and so many awkward moments.

I implore you…. Look deep within yourself and start making changes. Listen to yourself. Love yourself.

Let’s be the change for good… NOT this change that is happening in the United States. Lets all reevaluate what love is and what we have to give to each other.  Lets stop the crazy that is happening. Love is always living… hate is always death.

Peace, Love and Light friends! May you all be safe and understand our own boundaries…. Find your own road to healing J

Nomadic Soul Seeker